The Dancing Dead

Sounds like the name of a band or something.

It's another quote heard while driving somewhere. We were recently invited to a dance/party and my boys were remarking on their distaste for the activity (dancing, not partying).

David: I wouldn't be caught dead dancing.
Joel: I wouldn't be caught dancing if I was dead.

Isn't that interesting. Both statements essentially mean the same thing, but the latter one appears ridiculous.

Unwritten...

Something is going on here...


"'You can always tell a man by his spelling.' - Quote that Matt just made up." --Matt, aka The Mattrix

"'Joel, get a grip, Halloween is over.' - My never-said quote. DON'T QUOTE." --Joel H.

Well, I just quoted Joel. I guess I'll become known for quoting things that shouldn't be quoted.....*thinks back on the 10-years-Beowulf-paper-date quote*

Wednesday Quotes

Daddy: *finishes swimming butterfly* Joel, how did I look?
Joel: No child should have to see their parent swim butterfly.

On the way to Radical Wednesday prayer meeting...

Sarah: I have an imaginary friend and Joel has two alternate personalities. Which one is more weird??
Kara: I'm not going to answer that.... In my world and my country, they call me normal.
Sarah: What is normal? What are cows?
Kara: Humphrey is a cow.

Sarah: Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy is a great movie!
Kara: I think my brother read the book, who was it written by?
Sarah: I confess..... I wrote it.
Kara: So THAT's why you're so stressed! All the hate mail.
Sarah: *shocked* You know about the hate mail???
Kara: *smug* I know all.
Sarah: Ah! You wrote it, didn't you?!?
Kara: *no comment*

*silence*
Kara: A duck died. (Referring to the saying that for every awkward silence, somewhere a duck dies)
Sarah: Abraham Lincoln! (Referring to the saying that for every awkward silence, someone in the conversation is thinking of Abraham Lincoln)
Kara: No! You didn't think of Abraham Lincoln! (Kara doesn't like the Abraham Lincoln saying.)
Sarah: I had to think it to say it!!!!!
Kara: *hmph*

On the way home from Radical Wednesday....

The boys are begging for a bedtime extension since their friend Will is staying over tonight.
Daddy: Well, you can't stay up too late or you won't get up on time in the morning.
Will: OO!! I know how to get them up! Whenever I'm here, they lean over the side of the bed and STARE.. at me til I wake up.
Joel:.... we're just waiting for you to wake up.
Will: Well, you could say, "Wake up, Will!" or throw pillows are me or something. You don't have to STARE.. at me.

During the prayer meeting, David fell out of his chair.
Will: So, David, I just have one question.... how did you manage to fall out of the chair? You just fell out, and I looked at you and you were bleeding all over the place, and I was like, Oh, gosh, he's split his mouth!
David: Yeah, I just had my feet up...
Will: And then you're like "doo, it's cobing frob by dose" and go running out of the room. And I was like, oh my gosh, he's bleeding severely, he needs medical attention! I was getting ready to get someone to call 911. I'm surprised you didn't go into a coma. Didn't it hurt?
David: Naw... well, the impact hurt a little, but the nosebleed didn't hurt.
Will: Well, OF COURSE the impact hurt!
Joel: *mutters* Nosebleeds are fun.
Will: OMGosh, did you just say that nosebleeds are fun?
Joel: Yeah...
Will: *sarcastically* Oh, oh, yes!! I'm bleeding all over my arm!! *pumps fist* Yes!! Ooo, it's running down my face! Yay!! *pumps fist again*

A Nice Stock of Beowulf Quotes

I've been very un-diligent in writing down my quotes so most of these are paraphrases that my mind has messed up, and for that I am terribly sorry to...okay, I'm going to not call my English teacher "The Professor Avery" because, according to her, she's not yet a professor. So she's Mrs. Avery from now on, 'kay? Good, you got it. Here's some of what I've learned in class these past few weeks:

"I always think it's fitting to watch a movie on the day before a break from school. So we're going to turn off the lights now and watch this movie about Grendel...now, no hanky, and no panky."

"Thanes are the 'free retainers' or basically the soldiers in the Anglo-Saxon time. Now, they aren't to be confused with Danes, which in the case of Beowulf is what they were. So...that would make them Dane-Thanes!"

"Now, your papers should be only five pages long, no more. Now, if you have Diarrhea of the Computer and keep writing more and more, you need to come see me."

"Okay, now, your papers are due on three dates. September 25th is what we'll call the Overachiever's date, and you'll get three extra points. October 2nd will be the Procrastinator's date, and you get no extra points, and no points taken off. Finally, October 7th you will get 15 points taken off and so that is the Fear of Success People's date." (class giggles) "Oh, now, let's not make fun of the Fear of Success People. They can't help it."

An analogy using the class as a whole: "We are all kin...we're all thanes of each other........I'm Beowulf."

Mrs. Avery: "Beowulf was a great guy, and always did the right thing. When someone drops a $20 bill on their way to the parking lot and you see it, you have to think like a hero. Think like Beowulf."
Some Guy in the Class: "What Would Beowulf Do?"
Mrs. Avery: "Exactly......WWBD!"

So there you have it.

Of Breakfasts and Qualifications

It is eight o’clock am in a certain household. Marck sits at the table hunched over his cereal, his hair sticking out in five million directions. Jessica, having had a little too much morning coffee, bounds in and stops in the archway, beaming like the bright morning sun. Her hair is not sticking out in a million directions, but it is in a messy bun to prevent such an occurrence.

Jessica: “Hey Marck…okay, what do you get when you have a pet sea lion that eats off your floor?”

Marck (unimpressed): “What?”

Jessica: “A vacuum seal!!!” (laughs heartily)

Marck (still unimpressed): “Oh yeah? Well, what do you call a lemur that eats off the floor?”

Jessica (thinks very hard): “Uuuuhhhhh…..I don’t know.”

Marck: “A vacuum lemur!”

Jessica blinks, staring blankly……..Marck bursts out laughing……Jessica rolls her eyes.


And to top off this post, here is what Maryn has to say on quotes:

“George Gordon is still alive….he can’t be quoted!” :D I suppose we’ve been going about this all wrong, in that case.

Swedish

Here we go!
My first quote(s)!!!

(Talking about Apple Safari)

Marck: "What's up with Safari? It's just a Hunks-a-junks.

Jessica: "Hunken, junken."

Marck: "Hunken, junken."

Jessica: " That is Swedish for 'hunk of junk'"

Marck: "if you speak Hungarian you have to end everything with 'ski'"

*Pause*

Jessica: "Hunski-Junkski"

So we’re at the pool, and Alex and I had been swimming laps so Alex says…
"When I swim my slow stroke, I have to swim it fast,
or else, I'm so skinny I'll sink."
~~Alex

Last One....

Russian Coke cans.

M: "This one's my favorite."

J: "What, Koka-Kora?"

M: I don't know.

J: "Kokra-kanka?"

M: “Kroha-kronka?”

J: “Koxa-Kona

*pause*

M: "Hakuna-matata!"

well, that's all!

Bassman560